June 2011
8 posts
Diet Soda Fast Week Three
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I’ve already awkwardly compared my lust for diet soda to a full on drug addiction a few times, and I kind of feel like an asshole for it. People have real drinking and drug problems. And I have neither. But it’s an easy analogy to draw. If I was building a birdhouse, I would compare it to the Egyptians crafting their pyramids. We all have...
Diet Soda Fast Week One
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No liquid fake sugar has passed these lips for an entire week. I joked around a lot about this effort to quit diet soda, because the premise is kind of ridiculous and I feel like kind of an asshole that this is one of the large problems in my life, but man, in all sincerity, did (does?) this thing have it’s hooks in me.
I’m young enough to...
Diet Soda Fast Day 4
Headaches.
Diet Soda Fast Day Three
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Remember when you were a kid, and you really wanted your dad to buy you a Super Nintendo? Only he, rightfully, thought you would spend all of your time playing it. “You already spend enough hours playing games on our Macintosh computer,” he may have said. He probably had a point. But at some point Spectre Challenger and Monkey Island 2...
Diet Soda Fast Day Zero
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DIET SODA POWER CLEANSE DAY ZERO:
The big day is here, you guys. We’ve all prepared for this for literally over a million months. Thanks to yoga-lates, we’re the thinnest we’ve ever been in our lives. We’re ready to pour ourselves into that wedding dress and have everyone stare at our upper arms for an hour. We’re...
Diet Soda Fast Day Negative Something #2
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Day Negative Something #2 (possibly negative two):
Diet soda, my relationship with you has gotten complicated. At first you were unbelievable. You’ll provide me with all of the sweetness I need—with none of the downsides? I’m so in love with you. But over time I’ve become too dependent on you, which is never healthy in a...
Diet Soda Fast Day Negative Something
It’s finally happened. I’ve had too much Diet Dr. Pepper to drink. I never thought it would come to this, but at some point I’ve got to realize that drinking what is probably carcinogens at the rate I’ve been is a bad thing. I’m going to take it slow, first, a week. Then re-evaluate. BUT I can’t start this until I finish my current case of Diet Dr. Pepper, which...