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“What sort of life do I live where I spend my time debating the merits of DeAndre Jordan as compared to Nick Collison? I should be outside, here.”

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“Every time you come up here you get all profound about the natural beauty. But you’re not Thoreau, no matter how much you want to be. You’re not even trying.”

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“I have so much information available to me, right at my fingertips. I can’t resist taking in as much as I can.”

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“All of that would go away if you disappeared into the woods. You would have to show some passion and urgency.”

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“I bet I could use newspaper to line my clothes and stay warm. Like a homeless guy.”